Blended Family Counseling
Frequently Asked Questions:
- What is a “blended” family?
A simple definition of a blended family, also known as a step, reconstituted or complex family, is a relationship unit where one or both parents have children from a previous relationship, and they have combined to form a new family. The parents may or may not then have children with each other. There are over 67 combinations of blended families, therefore, creating an easy answer as to the exact definition of a blended family may be a little more difficult to explain. Blended families have become much more common over the last several decades with 1300 new blended families forming every day, while statistically speaking, 50% of US families are remarried or re-coupled.
- What are some common issues that blended may face?
“You’re not my real mommy” or “I don’t have to mind you” may be familiar things heard in the home of a blended family. In addition to the usual concerns that a nuclear family may have, blended families have challenges that are unique to them. The couple may have a difficult time putting their marriage first, as many have lived as single parents for a significant period of time and have become accustomed to doing things a certain way. Children, sometimes have a difficult time “sharing” their parent with someone else and the spouse may feel as though they are not getting the attention that they deserve and desire. This may cause the blended family to feel as though they are two separate families living under one roof. There also may be differences in parenting styles, sibling rivalry, identity confusion, differences in communication styles, legal disputes, stepparent discipline challenges, scheduling conflicts and financial difficulties just to name a few.
- Can counseling help us navigate through the challenges that we face?
Yes! We offer sessions for individual family members, couples and families together. Our therapists may also recommend separate play therapy sessions for younger children and individual sessions with older children as well. Several ways that our therapists are able to assist couples who are thinking about blending their families or who have joined families together include: discovering and avoiding altogether or helping walk through certain traps that families may fall into, understanding how to set good boundaries, conflict resolution, dealing with grief, creating new “stories” together, establishing a co-parenting relationship with ex partners (if safe and possible), effective communication and transition into a “new norm” that will be healthy and empowering for each member.
- With all of the negative aspects of a blended family, is there hope?
Absolutely! We believe that there is beauty in brokenness and feel that blended families can become a magnificent masterpiece with the right tools. With time, patience, a pretty large learning curve, and space for grace, challenges created when blending a family can be overcome. Let us help you navigate the journey!